Woroni Adopts The Wombat

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On Tuesday the 4th of October 2016, the current Woroni Board unanimously passed a motion adopting the Wombat as the official Woroni mascot. The parallels between the two could not go undocumented any longer, with some calling the decision “the greatest thing Woroni has ever done.” From this moment onwards, all members of the Woroni team must be referred to as members of The Wisdom, as this is the accurate scientific label for a group of wombats.

Wombats diverged from other Australian marsupials around 40 million years ago, and are now classified as a separate family. Similarly, brave members of the Woroni Editorial Board cut their ties with the hacks at ANUSA, establishing an entirely independent student organisation (which is somewhat like a dysfunctional family) back in 2011.

Since these evolutionary occurrences, both groups have evolved to become extremely strong and proficient diggers (for the truth), with brains that entirely fill their skulls, indicative of high intelligence levels. While their eyesight is often poor, they have a keen sense of smell, phenomenal hearing and are able to detect ground vibrations, making them ideal investigators. Though not commonly seen, wombats leave ample evidence in their wake. They often bulldoze through obstacles, leaving a clear and safe path behind them – just as The Wisdom have established multiple platforms of communication, accessible to each and every student, where their voices will be unobstructed and heard loud and clear. The Wisdom have made it their mission to break down barriers and overcome obstacles, so that all the other animals at the ANU have a safe path, and a safe space, in which to showcase their stories, opinions and talents.

While it cannot be denied that, at times, some hairy-nosed wombats have infiltrated the group of otherwise bare-nosed wombats, on the whole, these intruders have often left the group as quickly as they came.

Wombats are often considered a nuisance by the other animals around them, but this is a misconception. Our burrows may be annoying and we may smell a little bit, but wombats can out dig a man with a shovel, and as long as there is still ground to be dug, we will be there to dig it.

Admittedly, we are sometimes a little stocky, a little hairy and may awkwardly waddle around, but it is what is on the inside that counts. We are a playful bunch – head butting, biting and somersaulting constantly to display our affection for each other. This is just the way us wombats banter.

We pledge to keep waddling along, digging up dirt, and leaving a safe path in our wake.

There will always be those who would prefer their ground to remain undug. To that, we say, “No.”