North Korea to Ban Organic ‘Western’ Health Foods

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Reports have surfaced from North Korea that Kim Jong-un has banned the consumption of vegan, organic and related fresh food products from the everyday diets of North Koreans. Yesterday, under the totalitarian regime, the Supreme People’s Assembly passed down legislation to outlaw food products and trends which are considered to be ‘western’ in nature.
This provides further control to the state in influencing the daily activities within North Korea.

In addition to the ruling, North Korea’s Facebook equivalent – “Best Korea’s Social Network” – has been forced to remove any hashtags promoting western dietary trends including #vegan, #bestofvegan, #whatveganseat and #eatlite, which may cause social media users to revert against the state’s core culinary values.

South Korea is to take official action, however, as the Asian media has reported that activists have started to collect supplies to construct make-shift cannons, more commonly known as “orange bazookas”, to fire fresh fruit and related products over. Considering tensions are already high on the shared border between the two Korean nations due to recent engagement in artillery fire from the South Korean Military in January, this decision by activists is yet to be ratified by South Korean officials.

Greenpeace Australia have postponed their rallies for Great Barrier Reef conservation, with funding diverted instead to funding vessels entering North Korean controlled waters decorated with flags depicting “World War Vegan.” Plans to send in Parachutists armed with gluten free baguettes and sachets of organic quinoa and goji berries have been devised by NGOs, despite the United Nations Department of Peace Keeping Operations condoning such activities.

Whilst the Australian Parliament is yet to comment on the decision, One Nation Party leader, Pauline Hanson, has also openly expressed concern over the newly formed legislation saying “it’s just un-Australian.”

At the time of writing, a list of banned substances is currently being drafted in Pyongyang. A full list will be released as soon as it is made public to the people of North Korea.