There is too much pride in my heart

For me to end it all.

If I perished there would be laughter,

Ecstasy from those I despise,

Whose misfortunes

I relish in my dreams

And which I savour more

Than they would my own adversity


Never would I tell them 

How wrong they were, 

For now I sparkle with grandeur. And I am sweet 

Unlike the taste of the bitterness  

They would so surely exude,

Which I have awaited all my life⁠

And would greet with elation.

At last, I can feast on my life.


Sometimes I wonder

If you too could see

The wrath, the hellfire, 

The knives and coffins,  

Would you also say, 

With horror and certainty:

There is too much hate in my heart

For me to lead a life

That one might want to live?